I've Cooled Down ... That's a Probably a Lie

Since I have cooled down both literally and figuratively, I can now tell you about our moving experience without getting emotional (irate ... not teary). By now I am able to look at the situation with slight humor; however, four weeks ago I was seething. If I was a dragon, I would have spewed fire (we've been watching Game of Thrones). I came real close to posting pictures of the previous homeowners all across the Retirement Community and sending a citywide mail out warning people not to buy a house from them because they will rip you off and leave you feeling cheated, vulnerable, and questioning every decision you have made in life up to this point. However, I am much more mature about the situation now, so I won't link this blog to their Facebook profile because that is cyber bullying. Needless to say four weeks ago, I had complete buyers' remorse, and as an avid shopper, I NEVER have buyers' remorse. I have moved every one to two years since I was 18. I would almost classify myself as a moving pro at this point, and this move will go down as one of my most tumultuous moves. To paint the picture as accurately as I can, I will start from the beginning and bore you with every detail ... you need to feel as irate at the end of this blog as I did.

• We found a house in the perfect neighborhood and a semi-perfect location (I need a grocery store within one to two miles of me in case I am cooking and need an ingredient ... simple request ... but absence makes the heart grow founder so I am adjusting to the distance). 
• We made our offer at asking price, only to be told that our future house wasn't worth asking price because the house was actually smaller than it was listed - the previous homeowners (PHO) counted the non-air-conditioned sun room as sq. feet. Easy over site (I guess). A little agitated, we adjusted our offer, even though PHO really didn't want to come down on the asking price and wouldn't work with us on closing. (They had a sob story and didn't want to lose any more money ... Everyone can cook up a decent sob story when they need to.) 
• Offer accepted with the contingency that the air-condition was fully serviced (since we now live in the north, it was too cold to check the AC during the inspection). 
• Two days before closing, we get a text message from male PHO asking if we will pitch in to help pay for the $635 AC service because the Freon was completely empty. (By now I was already convinced they were cheap.)
• We didn't respond. 
• We closed. 
• They moved out on Sunday. 
• We moved in on Sunday. 
• Sunday 8:00 pm we have no AC. 
• Monday we call the AC company, and they inform us that yes, the AC was serviced, but they didn't check for a leak because PHO's Realtor was adamant that the company was just to service the unit, not check for the likely leak. 
• Tears were shed, doorknobs were broken, plates were smashed, Sonic Route 44 waters were flying, there was a slight wreck with the mailbox and my car (no one was injured and the mail was all intact). Over $5,000 later, we have a brand new unit and an extra vent in the sun room. 

In hindsight there were signs that the unit was faulty, but I just chalked it up to them being British and wanting the windows open on the nice spring days.  Apparently the word disclosure is not in the British vocabulary because they let a pregnant lady move into a house that they were fully aware didn't have AC. This is the one time I am openly pulling out the pregnant lady card ... a pregnant lady went three days without AC in the dead heat of Spring.

PHO bought an AC vent that was too small
so they duck taped it into the vent. 

I don't think I would have felt as vulnerable and cheated if this were the only mishap. These people completely ransacked the house. If you aren't familiar with home buying, if it's attached in anyway, it stays. They took the attached gazebo out of the backyard, the attached curtain rods, the massive 4 ft. flower pots in the front yard, the attached toilet paper holder in the guest bathroom (...yes), the spare flooring to floor their new house, the attached shelving in the garage, and pretty much anything that they might need in their new house. I fully believe if they needed a stove, they would have taken the one from the kitchen. Loads of other things were broken and disguised to look intact.
As a token of generosity and to make up for their thievery, they intentionally left opened baby formula and breast feeding gel packs (thanks), and unintentionally left a birthday card with a $20 Starbucks gift card ... yes I promptly loaded that bad boy onto my Starbucks app ... If you are going to play dirty, so am I!  

In the words of the great Justin Timberlake, "What goes around comes around." So good luck previous homeowners. I hope your new house with old-house flooring is working out for you. If I see you in the grocery store, I won't smile; I will turn my buggy around.