Mid-20's Crisis ... I'm Dramatically There

Well summer came and went, and much to no one's surprise (well probably to most people's surprise ... well hopefully to most people's surprise) I didn't land a teaching job in this Semi-Retirement Community. (I've downgraded the status of my current location from Retirement Community to a Semi-Retirement Community because most of the old people moved north to the Village, and there is a larger population of 30-50 year olds here than I previously thought and most of them haven't retired yet. (also the locals were complaining about the name... just being honest.))

Maybe I'm going overboard about my mid-20's crisis, but I would like to point out that my 4th grade teacher was absolutely correct when she named me "Most Dramatic" in the class. (To this day, I still regret not being quick-witted enough to give an acceptance speech.) If you can't be dramatic about not finding a job, not even knowing what you want to be when you grow up and yet you are grown up, living in a new town with new people, feeling like you don't have a purpose in life besides being a house keeper, or the fact that no one offered you a bazillion dollars for your "Fantasy Shopping" game, then what can you be dramatic about? This is real life people, and I'm going to be dramatic. I did a lot of job hunting this morning on the Internet, and found that Best Buy and Chilli's are my main two options. Lucky Me!- Sike. (If you skipped the 90's and are unfamiliar with the term sike, it means: not really or I'm totally lying.) Since that was a bust, I started looking for real jobs like being a Greeting Card editor, a nail polish or lipstick namer, and any job that deals with clothing. Still I came up empty handed ...  imagine that. I even looked into unemployment ... I don't think I qualify, but that is ok! I'm dramatically staying positive. 

By now, I'm sure you'll agree this can be considered a mid-20's crisis. My two friends have tried to comfort me and help me look on the bright side. They said maybe I should figure out what I really want to do in life ... like I haven't been trying to figure that out since 16, and I'm still at a lose. They also suggested that I should have a kid, well that makes a lot of sense, since we are poor. (I do kind of want a kid because I want to name it and dress it.) Well my bright side was being able to go on a trip to the Cayman Islands courtesy of my fabulous sister-in-law who knows about my crisis, but there's a hurricane coming. Just my luck! Don't worry we did relocate so there is still a bright side, but after this weekend, I don't know what my bright side is going to be. In case you noticed, I did also downgraded my friend size because I really only hang out with two of them. Just to make it clear I have two friends and three acquaintances who may be on the verge of being friends. Really only time will tell. I guess only time will tell if I find a job, but in the meantime, I'm being dramatic about my crisis. The worst part about it is I'm too poor so go on a Mid-20's crisis shopping spree.